After 16 years of marriage, my husband and I have filed for divorce.  This is a weird feeling and I'm confused.  Where do I start over after all these years??

I keep forgetting to eat, but the workouts are going pretty well.  Workouts are the best stress relievers, but tend to suck when I don't eat.    I have decided to train for a 5k here in October, at least to give me a goal and something to work for and keep my mind off of what is going on.

I know several of you have gone through this over the last couple of years.   Advice please?

I'm so sorry Beka. Most important advice I can give is to take care of YOU and don't forget to breathe. It's a tough time no matter how you go about it. But you know on tracker you get non-judgemental support. Hang in there GF. Are you in Tennessee?? Michele from RFL and I are doing a half in Murfreesboro in October. You should join us.

Janice

I think that's the one I decided to do, but there's 2 in Murf around that time?  I'm in Lebanon, actually, right around the corner from there.

And I would love to

It's "The Middle". I would love, love, love to meet you!! It's on the 16th.

I will be coming from the Louisville area, so a bit further for me.

Beka I don't know the situation, but I do know that you have always been very positive in the face of change.  Hang in there and I'm just an hour over the TN state line if you want to get away for a weekend.

"Put your big girl panties on and deal with it."

Why not, Janice?  I'd love to meet you, too.  That's really something to work for and look forward to  

Michelle, I may take you up on that when it settles down here.  That's so sweet of you to offer!  I appreciate the encouragement.

When my first marriage ended, I had two kids. Amanda was 3 and Levi was 7. It was especially hard on Levi. I think his daddy leaving broke his heart. I still feel sad thinking about it.

He was a long-haul trucker with a girlfriend in about every one of his stops,and he finally decided that life was more fun that being at home with me. Anyway, I had been a stay at home mom, so had no job skills other than waitressing and was scared to death.

I went to Tennessee Technological University and applied, and was surprised that they accepted me. This was in 1995. I graduated in 2000.

Going to school took my mind off of how hard our everyday life was. I did my homework at the kitchen table, and the kids would do theirs. It was a neat way to bond. :0) Have you thought about going back to school? Even if you have a degree already, you could go and take some classes. It made me feel good to tackle those hard assignments, and I actually graduated with honors, which was crazy for someone who only had a GED and had been home raising kids for years.

My advice is for you to find something to do that gives you a goal to focus on, whether it be going back to school, or training for a marathon run.

Also, be tender with your children. They are going to be angry, sad, maybe happy that the tension is out of the house, but they are going to have all kinds of feelings, so be ready to take all of that in. I was reading your blog the other day, and was amazed at how open your kids are with you. You should be so proud that you have teenagers who actually talk to you and tell you what is going on in their lives.You don't know how rare that is, lol.... You have done a good job with them! :0)

So sorry to hear about your divorce, Beka.  Things will be hard for a while, so my only real advice to you is to remember that sometimes things like this happen for a reason even though we can't see it at the time. When I get divorced I did not know if I would ever want to be married again, but now I am with the best woman ever!

The one thing I know about you is that you are a strong person and you will come out of it a stronger person.  Let me know if there's anything I can do and try not to stress out too much -- it's bad for you!

Daisy, I thought about it, but I'll go back to doing hair part time to keep me busy during the day.  My child support will be good, thank God, but it's more about keeping my mind busy.  I had no idea that you had been divorced.  It's inspiring to me that you came out of it so well.

Thanks Carol.

Thanks John, I remember you going through a tough time with yours.  I'm glad you found a good woman and she looks like a real cutie, too.